Failure is as much a part of life as pain. It’s unavoidable. We can try to not fail, but sooner or later reality catches up with us, and we feel the sting of failure.
And like pain, failure comes in varying degrees of intensity, magnitude, and cost. Regardless of the nature of failure, the thing that’s most important is how we handle it.
How do we cope with failure?
Failure in and of itself is not the issue. It’s how we feel about it that turns an experience into a soul-crushing trauma.
The feelings accompanying failure spread far beyond the situation, and color our perception of everything else—including our sense of value and worth. So how we deal with failure will have a huge impact on our entire life.
The mechanisms of coping with failure are the same as any other perceived negative experience.
Before you read the rest of this article, think of past experiences of failure, and see how you used the following mechanisms to cope.
Denial and avoidance: We refuse to admit that things are not working, so we keep trying. We push harder, feel more desperate, and more stuck than ever. Or we pretend that everything is fine, and do whatever it takes to maintain the status quo. [Continue Reading…]