How many things do you have on your to-do list? How many projects remain uncompleted or not even started?

How do you feel when you think about all the things you want to get done?

A couple of days ago, I started imagining what it would be like if I had a task genie. What tasks and projects would I assign to the genie to complete for me? And what projects do I want to do myself, regardless of the time and effort required?

I started answering the exciting question first—the things that I want to do, no matter what. There were 5 items on that list, and none of them was a surprise. The same stuff came up: investing, composing music, playing the piano, writing, and learning. I felt excited, motivated, and a bit scared. It was a good mix of feelings.

Then came the not so much fun part—listing all the things I want to get done but don’t want to do myself. I started the listing with enthusiasm wanting to clear my mind. I didn’t look into any existing lists or reminders. I just wanted to take the stuff out of my mind as I thought of it.

As I kept writing and adding to the list, I felt more anxious. It took me about 15 minutes of writing before I stopped—I could barely catch my breath. There was so much on that list. Most of the items are home maintenance stuff: wall patching, spring cleaning, de-cluttering certain areas and getting organized.

I didn’t finish the list. I stopped and looked at it. Usually I deal with the really important stuff as it comes up. For example tile sealing in the bathrooms is crucial if I want to prevent moisture from seeping into the walls—it takes me a couple of days to complete and I get it done when it’s due. The other things like a ding on a wall that needs to be filled and painted, blinds cleaning and stuff like that gets pushed back. But they linger in the back of my mind. Over time things start adding up and overwhelm kicks in.

An intentional stop

After I stopped, I realized that a lot of the things I listed have been there for a while. So obviously they’re not that urgent. What would happen if I didn’t do anything?

It’s usually very hard to stop when you’re bombarded with things to do. Our reactive mind pushes us to do something—anything, just to feel we’re making progress.

It may seem counterintuitive to stop for a period of idleness. It’s necessary, however, if we want to gain some perspective.

Feeling overwhelmed means that my mind is taking this stuff seriously and it’s freaking my body out.

In order to break the feeling of overwhelm, I decided to stop for a day and do nothing. What’s going to happen?

Absolutely nothing! The things are going to remain not done for another day or week or month or year. So what?

A day of doing nothing

I chose the first day when I didn’t have any important commitments to stop and not do anything.

I turned off the alarm the night before and decided to sleep in. I got up when I felt ready to, read for about an hour in bed before moving and then had my coffee basking in the sun.

Other than writing in my journal for a few minutes, I didn’t do any work on the computer. I read, watched TV and then soaked my tired feet in a warm relaxing bath. That was all I did.

Nothing collapsed; the world is still as it was the day before, and my list remains unchanged.

A whole lot of stuff we worry about is really not a big deal. These tasks can wait or be completely ignored.

What you can learn from doing nothing

When we stop acting and reacting we get a chance to look at things without false urgency and anxiety. The main benefits can be summed up below:

1- Calm the fearful mind

I think the best practice to convince your mind of the fallacy of its assumptions is to do the opposite and prove to yourself that things are okay.

When I stopped for a day I proved to my mind that things are manageable. I don’t have to do everything my mind thinks I should.

2- Transform your emotions

Questing the mind and proving that it’s wrong is one of the best ways to feel an inner calm.

You interrupt the mind from feeding negative emotions on a subconscious level, before you even notice.

3- Reprioritize

A break is needed every now and then to help us refocus on what matters. Leaving things incomplete is not so bad when we realize that they’re not that important.

Pursuing a handful of dreams and desires is not only more rewarding in the long run, it’s the fuel that keeps your soul alive. It’s what motivates you to do the things on your genie list.

What does one do on a do-nothing day?

It depends what nothing means to you. For me it was about relaxing and doing things that I enjoy outside of work without guilt or worry.

It can be anything from staying in your pajamas all day, eating when you feel like it, reading a novel, watching TV, taking a bath, napping, or just sitting and enjoying the silence.

The most important thing is not to cheat yourself and pretend that you’re not doing anything when in fact you’re trying to catch up on house chores or any unfinished work.

The whole point is to not work on anything on your to-do list and not worry about it.

If you can’t take a full day off

Take an afternoon, or even an hour. Try and take one full day on the weekend if you can. Just start where you are and break the cycle of action by consciously choosing to say no to your list and yes to inaction.

On keeping a genie list

I have my genie list and will keep adding to it. Writing things down puts the mind at ease. But this time I’m going to make my list more fun and less serious. I  won’t allow it to take control of my inner state.

The genie list is for all the things that I would like to get done, but if they don’t, it’s not the end of the world. The list can help in making decisions: I can hire someone to do some work and get it over and done with. I can motivate myself every now and then to get something off the list. Or simply remove the item.

I invite you today to imagine what it would feel like to rub a magic lamp and have a genie do all the work for you. What work would you delegate and what are the things that are yours—and only yours?

The list of things you want to do is what’s truly in your heart. Breathe, smile and work on that. The rest will take care of itself through you, time or someone else.  And when things get a bit overwhelming have a relaxing do-nothing day and enjoy every minute of it.

Photo by jenny downing

Do you dislike repetition?

Repetition creates boring routines that numb the mind and suck the joy out of life. This is what I used to think. And I admit sometimes I still resist routine.

The thing is: repetition is a fundamental part of the laws of life.

Imagine if gravity decided to take it up a notch (or tone it down a bit) because it was bored. That wouldn’t be fun for us—we’d be either compressed to the ground, or floating in the air.

Life repeats itself with every breath, every heart beat and every sunrise. When the routine of life breaks down momentarily (earthquakes, tsunamis and so on), it’s because nature is rebalancing.

We are also creatures of habit and repetition. We eat the same foods, perform the same tasks and hang out with the same people. We repeat the same activities and then we get bored.

“Nature is an endless combination and repetition of a very few laws. She hums the old well-known air through innumerable variations.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Repetition gets a bad rap because it stands in the face of spontaneity and variety. It creates comfort zones that imprison us; it becomes our jailer.

This is one way of looking at it. But like so many things in life, repetition is neutral. We polarize it by our choices.

Repetition is an activity that can be used or abused.

Repetition creates habits—good and bad.

Repetition is the mother of skill and mastery.

Repetition sets beliefs that empower or impair.

Repetition can be our best friend or our worst enemy.

We can focus on the boring and destructive side of repetition, or we can make the best of it.

How can we make repetition fun?

We’re going to use repetition to start something we’ve been yearning to do but can’t get excited about because of the dread of repetition and practice.

Here are five simple steps that will help in the process.

Emotional motivation

Engaging your positive emotions, especially when it comes to the monotonous, can be very motivating.

Build up anticipation and excitement about getting to practice a certain skill. Indulge in your dreams and desires. Imagine success with deep feeling to boost your motivation.

Let’s say you want to learn Spanish. Imagine your favorite Spanish actor or actress as your tutor. How fun would it be to have a conversation with them!

One small step at a time

Some projects are more daunting than others. They require a lot of work to learn the skill and become familiar with specialized terminology.

Take the example of learning how to compose music using all the technology out there—a gazillion software programs, loops, samples, instruments, plus the basics like music theory and maybe learning how to play an instrument.  If I think of the whole thing, I will never learn anything.

But I can start with one thing. Learn how to use one computer program, one step at a time. I can practice each feature till I’m familiar with it, then move on to the next feature. And I’ll do that one thing over and over with the enthusiasm and intensity of a five year old.

With every step, we gain more understanding and clarity of the process. This enables us to determine what to do next when the time comes.

No time boundaries

Don’t put a timeframe on when you expect yourself to see visible results. It’s perfectly expected to struggle and suck when we start something new.

It’s best to focus on your practice and move forward when you feel comfortable, instead of forcing yourself into compliance with an unrealistic deadline.

Focus on the act not the result

When you’re starting something new, you imagine what it would look like to be an expert. But the truth is: it takes tremendous time (about 10,000 hours) with lots of repetition to master a skill.

So don’t focus on becoming the best. Focus on your practice and progress. Did you do a little better today than yesterday? It’s more empowering and motivating.

Actively engage

Immerse yourself fully in the experience. Become one with whatever you’re doing. Live it, breathe it, touch it, smell it, and relish it. This is the best fun anyone can have. Play and learn like a child without a worry in the world.

Back to our Spanish learning example, have a conversation with your best star. If you still can’t pronounce a word, make it up and laugh.  Look up the word and try again.

A bunch of don’ts

An added emphasis here on things we subconsciously do that make us suffer with repeated activities. If you want to enjoy your repetition,

Don’t turn the action into a chore you have to do. You’re doing it by choice.

Don’t resist what you want to do. Instead look forward to it. You’ll have a blast.

Don’t procrastinate. Honor your commitment to yourself.

Don’t let doubt and fear paralyze you. Acknowledge your feelings and keep going. It’s never too late or too early. You’re never over or underprepared.

Don’t nag yourself. We (or at least I) tend to do the opposite of what nags at us (me). It’s better to cut yourself some slack and remind yourself of your reasons for wanting to learn or develop a skill. Forgive yourself for relapses and mistakes. Then move on. Keep it light.

Repetition is crucial to your growth. It’s a wonderful friend. Enjoy its company and let it help you in fulfilling your desires and becoming all you can be.

Photo courtesy of Steven Depolo

Lack of focus is a major struggle for a lot of people. Feeling unfocused can be quite discouraging and frustrating.

When we feel scattered, we get nothing done. So we look for new tricks to help us focus. I often say to myself: I need to learn how to focus.

There are numerous resources out there to teach you how to reduce distractions and focus on what’s important. Such resources give you tools to help you focus more. But they don’t teach you how to focus.

No one can teach you how to focus. Why?

Because you’re already an expert in focusing. It’s like breathing to all of us.

We are born focused.

Think of how a newborn stares at you, unmoved by anything else.

So what’s the problem? Why can’t we focus and get results?

The answer to this question is twofold:

Either we focus on the wrong thing—what’s not important avoiding what we really want (ineffective focus). Or

We jump from one thing to the next every few minutes—when we’re bored and can’t find something interesting to hold our attention for longer periods.

We don’t lack the skill of focus. We just choose to use it inefficiently.

When do we use our focus efficiently and effectively?

We not only focus, but we obsess—without much effort—in some situations, not others. So what makes the difference?

Let’s look at a couple of familiar examples.

Think of when you first fall in love—the prospect of a new relationship, the excitement, the thrill of being with the person that holds your affection. You’re consumed by the relationship. Even when you’re in a room full of people and noise, you don’t care. You have your eyes on one person only and the rest is just noise that fades in the background. You’re completely focused on that person.

Another example: ever had a crush on one of your schoolteachers, or really admired them? Did you enjoy his/her class? Chances are it became the most interesting subject and you wanted to do your best, without much effort.

The common thing among any experience with intense and natural focus is the strong positive emotional charge behind it.

This is not about the end result of such connections or relationships. I’m not saying it’s right to have a crush on your teacher. And you may fall in love with the wrong person for you. The aim is to just capture that raw unfiltered attention on what you wanted at the time.

If we can recreate that emotion, we can focus effortlessly.

When we’re in love, with someone (or a project), everything seems to fall into place. We feel good physically and emotionally which makes it much easier to focus mentally.

Emotional focus

We are emotional beings. We might be rational every now and then, but we’re more emotional than rational. We feel and then we justify.

So why not use positive, motivating emotions to drive our focus?

It’s easy to focus when you’re dealing with something you’re passionate about. It’s much harder to focus when you’re doing something you don’t like.

How can you create good feelings when you’re faced with the mundane, feared or disliked task?

To create a positive emotion, you need to face the tyranny of resistance. Your mind will engage every possible excuse and distraction.

The trick is to reframe your feelings and approach. Here’s how.

Reverse your emotions.

For every dread and fear, there is a release on the opposite side.

Instead of thinking I hate this task, think of what it would feel like when you’re done. What a relief!

Let’s take the silly example of washing the dishes. It can be a great experience in awaking and having fun.

You don’t want to do the dishes. You resist it, big time—the water is cold, my hands are dry, I have so many other things to do and so on.

Your resistance grows with every dish you add to the pile. You do whatever you can to avoid the sink area in your kitchen. And the longer the dishes sit, the harder it will be to remove all the dried up food. More pain!

Instead of dwelling in the same emotional pit of frustration, think of the other side.

What would it feel like if you went to the kitchen and the dishes were done and your kitchen was spotless?

Go into that feeling for a few moments.

Engage your imagination.

Let’s turn washing the dishes into a little fun encounter.

Stand in the kitchen and have a conversation with the dishes in the sink. You can talk out loud if you’re okay with that.

Tell the dishes how you feel. Express your hate for them getting dirty and you having to clean up. Let them know what a relief it would be to have them out of there.

Now let the dishes talk. What would they say? They’d probably say something like this.

Hey you. We didn’t ask to be used and sit in the sink for hours. You ate the food we served.

If you don’t wash us, you can’t use us again. And if you want to use those paper plates, by all means, just don’t blame us for the added cost and waste.

We’re sitting here in the cold and we stink! We suffer because of your inability to see your part in this.

And by the way, how long do you think it would take you to bathe all of us in warm soapy water? How would you feel when we’re all clean and shiny and tucked in our cupboard?

We would be happy for sure. We don’t like sitting here anymore than you do. Take care of us and you will have your sink back. It won’t take that long … really.

What would you say to the dishes after you listen to their plea?

Would you feel like doing the dishes now?

Positive emotion + imagination = effortless focus

When you turn the emotion around and use your imagination, do your best to engage all your senses to intensify the positive feelings.

Here are a few examples.

You don’t want to do your taxes. Think of the refund and the relief that you don’t have to do taxes for another year. What are you going to do with the extra money? Can you feel the check in your hand?

You don’t want to clear your desk. Imagine the space after you’re done and what it would feel like to have your desk back, to liberate it from the occupying mess. You are the superhero and the protector of your helpless desk.

You don’t want to work on a project because of a difficult manager. Think of how it would feel when you give him or her an amazing piece of work—a masterpiece. You are the Picasso of your workplace. Every task is a work of art, colorful and genuine. What can your boss say to your brilliance, other than job well done?

Effortless focus x repetition = fun + effective results

When you’re not focusing on what you want, look for the feelings underneath your resistance and reverse them. Turn dread to fun and fear into an adventure.

Use your imagination to make things interesting. It’s your best mental faculty; it hardly gets used in positive ways. All of resistance is imagined negativity.

When you focus emotionally, distractions fade and excuses become irrelevant.

The end result might not be what you expect. Sometimes it will be better and other times not so much. It won’t matter because the journey was fun; you gave it your best and got the best possible result.

One of the best feelings in the world is an inner calm—a stillness within that transcends time and the constant demands of daily living.

If you feel restless, unfocused, agitated, tired, uninterested, unmotivated, stuck, consider doing this one thing: move.

Physically move your body.

A moving body whose motion was not retarded by any resisting force would continue to move to all eternity. ~Hermann von Helmholtz

Any movement will do. All you have to do is to get up and start—moving only for a few minutes at a time.

Here are a few ideas.

• Go for a short walk and get lost in walking and your thoughts.
• Go up and down the stairs a few times and feel your breath as your heart starts to beat faster.
• Wash a few dishes and feel the water. Fold the laundry, vacuum one small room or half a large room. Basically do 5 minutes of house chores.

If you’re stuck in an office or indoors do one of the following:

• March in place and move your arms above your head then to your sides.
• Throw a few punches in the air with your feet shoulder width apart.
• Rotate your arms and shoulders.

If you have a stationary bike, a treadmill, a stepper just do 5 minutes in intervals—one minute slow and the next fast and repeat.

Here are more ideas that you can choose from. Copy the movement without the tools (weights, exercise ball, etc.). Do it standing, not sitting or lying down.

• Low impact cardio
• Lower body movements: 1 & 2
• Upper body exercises 1 & 2

Do anything physical. The purpose is to get your body moving.

My experiment with movement

I have been doing this for more than a few months now. I use a mini stepper that I bought at a discount. I do 6 minutes at a time using one minute intervals of slow then fast.

I stop every 50 minutes of work and do the 6 minutes to a total of 30 minutes per day (5 sessions of 6 minutes each). I have been more successful in sustaining this than any longer cardio workout I tried in the past.

The inner benefits of moving

There are many health benefits to physical activity—burning excess calories and fat, reducing risk of disease and improving strength and endurance.

You also gain tremendous mental and emotional benefits from moving—you feel more alert and more at peace. Consider these added benefits when you move.

1. Stimulate the brain.

When you get up and move, you give your mind a jolt. You break the cycle and give it something new. Your brain thrives on novelty.

This awakens and relaxes you at the same time.

2. Release stuck thoughts and emotions.

Physical movement forces your mind to break the cycle of thought, even if it’s momentary. This will strip negative thoughts from their hold on your mind.

Your mind will start paying attention to what you’re doing instead of dwelling in hypothetical negativity.

3. Refocus on this moment.

This is a result of shifting focus to the action at hand as mentioned above.

Depending on your level of fitness, moving might not be very comfortable in the beginning. No matter how unpleasant it feels, you will shift your focus from whatever was nagging at you into the activity you’re doing. Sometimes that’s all you need to step out of a negative thought pattern.

4. Inspire different ideas and action.

Clarity breads inspiration: as you feel better and clear the crud of stuck thoughts you may feel inspired to do different things. You may have the solution to a problem you’ve been pondering for a while.

5. Tune in internally.

Physical action leads to the mind chasing the body’s movement. This gets you to check in with your body and how it’s actually feeling, instead of the imagined struggle the mind creates when you’re sitting at your desk.

A few tips

To reap the benefits of moving, you need to make it part of your lifestyle and not just an occasional thing you do when you struggle. In order to do that, I highly encourage you to follow these simple suggestions.

1. Do it no matter what.

It may sound counter intuitive to get up and do something physical instead of getting things done. Make a decision to get up no matter what.

This will force your mind to take a break and step out of its repetitive process of stale self-defeating thoughts and worries.

2. Do it in short bursts.

Don’t get overly ambitious and move for a longer time. This will work once or twice but you won’t be able to sustain it. I’ve found it’s better to do 5 minutes every hour than to just do 15 or 20 minutes at lunch break. Five minutes is easier to sustain than 15.

3. Stick to your time.

Do 5 or 6 minutes at a time and no more. Work or sit for 50 minutes and break for 5, then get some water and repeat—50 minutes of work/sitting, 5 minutes for movement and 5 minutes preparing for the next 50 minute session.

I’m only recommending 50 minutes arbitrarily. You can choose a shorter or longer work session. I don’t recommend extending it to more than 60 minutes though. Your body needs to move.

Don’t extend your movement or work time as tempting as it may be. The more you stick to predefined intervals, the easier you turn them into a habit.

4. Keep it light

Don’t overdo it. The whole point is to do fun short movements that make you feel better but don’t take a lot of time.

If you do movements that target a certain muscle group (e.g. squats) vary the activity. Do something that targets the upper body (e.g. wall pushups).

Repeat the same movement a few times (10-20 times) and do another one. You don’t want to strain your muscles.

You can create a circuit of 5 movements and repeat each one as suggested above.

If you’re doing something that is not specific to one muscle group and you enjoy it (e.g. walking) keep doing it.

5. Respect your body.

Allow your body enough rest and hydrate. If you feel pain, deal with it as soon as you can. If you start sweating profusely or feel like you’re going to faint, stop. Don’t push it.

It goes without saying that if you have a medical condition or suffer from an injury, do what your doctor tells you. Move more when you feel you can do it. A little discomfort is bearable and you will move past it. But serious pain needs to be checked.

If you move for 5 minutes every hour for 8 hours a day, you will have spent a total of 40 minutes. Doing this for 300 days a year, will add up to 200 hours of movement—an amazing feat in maintaining your health and well being.

When you move, you feel better, you think better and you do better. Motion creates an outlet for stuck energy and infuses your entire being with calm and ease.

Inner stillness indeed can be found in outer motion.

Photo courtesy of Argenberg

In the previous article we talked about becoming aware of your blah moments and trying to see the pattern. I hope you got a chance to reflect on the times and occasions where you felt drained or unmotivated. It’s important to know where you’re at right now before you start moving forward.

What can you do to break the cycle of blah?

The simplest answer is to know the causes of your uninspired feelings and deal with them. Consider the action steps below.

Mental and emotional

Most of these recommendations are mental adjustments rather than actual action steps. But they can make a big difference.

1. Own your blah moments

Take full responsibility for how you feel. Don’t waste your precious time and energy looking for someone or something to blame. No matter what happens we can always choose how to react.

2. Don’t resist the feeling

This is probably the biggest cause of mental and emotional drain. When you’re not up to doing something, you keep fighting the fog and creating more pain for yourself.

Accept the blah as it comes. There is no point fighting it.

So when we don’t feel like it, it’s time to look within and see how we can move past it. Here is an idea: instead of fighting the feeling, ask for more.

Asking for more means you try and feel all the blah that comes your way. Tell your blah to bring it on, to give you all it’s got. What’s the worst thing that can happen?

I bet it won’t take more than a few minutes before you start feeling better. Surrender is very powerful in releasing stuck energy.

Talk to your blah and say something like: I know you’re here for a reason, tell me what I can learn from you.

3. Accept your limitations

You are not a machine and shouldn’t expect yourself t to function at the same level all the time. You will have good and not so good days. We all do. This means accepting your down time as mentioned above.

If you have a limitation in a certain area of your life, let it be. Instead of denying or avoiding it, work with it. Accept your limitations without judgment.

Ask for help if you need to. For example, if you’re not good with numbers but have to prepare a budget report, ask a colleague to help you or explain the hard stuff to you. People love to help. This is a better choice than staring blankly at your computer screen.

Instead of focusing on limitations, open up to the opportunities and resources that can be available to you.

4. Gain clarity

To motivate yourself to keep going, you need to be clear about what you want and why you want it.

This is one of the best things you can do for yourself. It will give you a sense of direction and ignite your motivation.

I’m not talking about rigid goals here. But things that you are passionate about and would love to have more of in your life. Read this article for more details.

A good article about the power of clarity can be found here. If you have a bit more time, check out this video (length: 8 minutes. Important part starts after 5 minutes to the end).

If you don’t have time to read the articles above, start with a list of things you’d like to be, do and have. From this list you can determine if your choices of actions so far have helped you in moving closer to your desires or if you need to change direction.

5. Learn to prioritize

If you can’t set your priorities straight, someone else will do it for you. You’ll spend most of your time doing what’s important to others, not you. This will overwhelm you even more.

Prioritizing is a skill that you get better at with practice. Every day determine what’s the most important task or two. Focus all your energy on getting these done first. You can handle anything else that comes your way after.

For more information about prioritizing check out this article.

6. Overcome feeling overwhelmed

One of the most popular posts on this blog is about moving past overwhelm. I will give you a short list of the main points here. But I recommend you read the full article here if you have time.

• Pick one thing that nags at you the most.
• Break it down to simplest actionable portions.
• Do one action step at a time.
• Commit to completion. Don’t do anything else unless this task is done.
• Repeat the above process with the next thing.

This may sound overly simplistic but it does work. The most important thing is to choose one thing and eliminate everything else from your stream of thought until you are done.

7. Be flexible

Balancing your important work with life’s unexpected interruptions is an art. Staying flexible means that you allow for things to happen. Don’t over commit or over schedule your time. It’s a recipe for disappointment.

As I mentioned above choose the most important task or two, max. This gives you ample time to deal with other things as they come. If you pick two tasks each day, you will complete 10 tasks a week and a whopping 500 tasks a year (assuming you work 50 weeks per year). This is quite an achievement.

I haven’t talked about fear in this article. I truly believe that the best way to face your fears is to start shifting your focus and taking action. Most fears, when it comes to moving forward, will be dealt with if you do the above.

Physical

It’s easy to determine what you can do physically, after dealing with the biggest obstacle—your primitive and protective brain. Consider these ideas as a start and add your own.

1. Move

Just move. Do anything to break the cycle of stagnant thoughts. When you move you improve your circulation and enhance your mood. Then your thought pattern starts to change. And you feel better.

These are simple ideas that won’t take much of your time.

• Walk up and down a couple of flights of stairs.
• Go outside for a walk. Five or 10 minutes will do.
• Get a glass of water and drink it slowly.
• Stretch. A bit of flexibility goes a long way and can ease your physical pain. Check out this basic routine or the office routine.

2. Optimize your diet

We all know we should eat healthy but how often do we do it?

If you determine that your diet causes you to be more sluggish, change what you eat gradually. Your goal is to eat healthy 80% of the time and you can do what you like with the remaining 20%.

This means cutting down on meat consumption, fried foods and sugar. Eat more whole grains and vegetables. And drink more water and less toxic beverages like sodas and alcohol.

3. Rest

If you’re exhausted you need to take a break and rest for a while instead of wasting more energy trying to force yourself to keep going.

Resting vs. mind numbing

Resting means not doing anything that stimulates your mind. Browsing the web or watching TV is not resting. It’s mind numbing. There is a big difference.

Resting allows you to wipe the slate clean and energize your mind and body.

Numbing your mind robs of you of time and energy. You don’t wipe the slate clean. You add more crap to your psyche which will make you feel worse after.

Consider these:

• Sleep or take a nap
• Listen to relaxing music
• Take a warm bath
• Meditate
• Walk or stretch, as mentioned above

4. Renew

This is something you can do to feel more energized over the long run. You give yourself time to do things that bring you joy.

Pleasure vs. Joy

There is a big difference between the two.

Pleasurable and thrilling activities will give you a high. The rush can be quite intoxicating. But as we all know, for every high there is a low. Going to loud parties, theme parks, alcohol consumption and extreme sports are examples of activities that will give you short lived pleasure.

What really helps is doing things that renew your energy and restore your sense of wellbeing. Here are examples:

• Spend time in nature. Star gaze, garden, watch a sunset, or walk on the beach.
• Connect with the people you care about the most. Spend time with family and friends. Nothing is more rewarding than a genuine human connection.
• Work on a hobby or start a new one. Lose yourself in something that brings you joy. You will forget about the troubles of the world and feel a wonderful sense of satisfaction.

Joy is more subtle but lasts much longer. You calmly and gently renew your entire being.

5. Manage your space

If your space is a mess, you need to deal with that before you can find your inspiration. De-clutter and rearrange your furniture to make your environment more inviting and suitable to your needs.

6. Reflect

Make it a habit to sit quietly and do nothing else. Reflect on your days and experiences. If you can’t just sit still and get lost in your thoughts, write them down.

Reflection gives you insight into what’s working and what can be improved in your life.

7. Act

After all’s been said and done, the one crucial thing that will make a difference is action. After you have dealt with the underlying reasons behind your unmotivated phase, you need to act. Start, move and make every action count.

I hope you find some of the suggestions above useful in moving forward. As you know there is no one definitive solution for any challenge. The key is to consciously choose the actions that suit you and keep going.

And regardless of where you are, may you always uncover the hidden gifts of awakening and growth that come from every experience in your life—including blah moments.

Photo courtesy of Paul Stevenson

Do you ever feel like you don’t want to do anything?

You stare at the work you’re supposed to be doing but feel blah. You’re in a blank state—unmotivated or bored.

The same can happen at home. You’re just not up to much and don’t know what to do with yourself. You feel numb and indifferent.

I go through phases of this blah state. I just sit there and do nothing. Or worse, I start wasting time, mostly online, doing useless stuff.

I had a conversation with Matt, a wonderful and talented reader. After the exchange I decided to run an experiment and keep a blah diary. Basically I would document all the moments that I felt numb and try to understand where these moments are coming from and what I can do about them.

Today I want to share with you some of the main findings and encourage you to start observing your own moments.

Why use a blah diary

Being in a dull state every now and then is not a big deal, but if it goes unnoticed for an extended period of time, it becomes part of your routine. It turns into a habit that causes you pain for no reason other than it hasn’t been noticed and questioned. It can be quite disruptive and draining.

A diary will help you in the following progression.

Observation creates awareness.

When you start recording (observing) your activities, you become more aware of them.

I usually track my productive time for work purposes but it’s much harder to track your unproductive time. Once you start noticing your blah moments, you pay more attention.

Awareness questions the behavior.

When you become aware, you start questioning your feelings, actions and motivations.

Questioning changes you.

Writing and reflecting on your experiences will change your perspective.

After you dig into your unsupportive behavior you become even more aware.  You realize that you can step out of the feelings that don’t serve you. Transformation is born out of your moment of choice.

How to create your own diary

The  process is quite simple. Start a document on your computer or use a pen and paper. Monitor your behavior. When you feel blah, document the following:

• What were you doing?
• The time of the day
• What you felt like
• What would you rather be doing instead?
• How did you move past the low moment?
• What do you think caused it?
• How often have you experienced a similar situation?

Keep doing it for at least a couple of weeks. After a while you won’t need to write things down. You will notice the pattern and the feelings.

Main causes of blah moments

The causes I encountered are listed below. I believe they are the main culprits. Other triggers are derivatives of any of them.

Mental and emotional

1. Overwhelm

This was the biggest one for me. To give you an example: I kept staring at my computer and dreading writing the gratitude journey article.

After a few days I realized that the main reason behind the struggle was that I felt the article was going to be too long. There was no way I’d be able to finish it on time.

The moment I came to the realization, I decided to split the post into two parts. That was it. I felt motivated to complete the first part and got it published on time.

Overwhelm is the feeling behind any of these thoughts: too many tasks and so little time, not knowing what to do, unrealistic expectations, and not having faith in one’s ability to act or things being out of control.

Overwhelm can be debilitating. It adds to your stress levels and drains your energy. You feel numb and avoid taking meaningful action.

2. Lack of clarity

There are three aspects of clarity that affect your attitude and behavior.

Unclear purpose: When you don’t know why you want to do something, it’s really hard for your mind and heart to commit to it. You can do it but it’s going to be an uphill battle with lots of blah interruptions.

Unclear outcome: You don’t know what the end is going to look like so you embark on a journey without a destination. It’s fun for a while then it gets confusing and overwhelming.

Unclear priorities: If you don’t know what’s important and what you need to get done, everything becomes fair game. And when everything is on equal footing, the easier and instantly gratifying action wins—always!

Messing around online or chatting on Facebook will win over working on that book you’ve been meaning to write (from personal experience).

3. Fear

This is the mother of all struggles. It can be a deeply rooted cause of  feeling unmotivated or incapable of starting a project or completing a task.

Everything that is unsupportive in our lives stems from one form of fear or another.

One of the simplest manifestations of fear is the nagging feeling that you should be doing something else instead of the task at hand—you fear you’re picking the wrong action. This feeling consumes you and you end up doing nothing.

Resistance and avoidance are the offspring of any of the above.

Physical

When our bodies are not functioning at an optimal level our mental faculties and emotional state suffer. The main areas are:

1. Diet

If you have a big meal, don’t expect miracles in focus and productivity. Your body is excellent in prioritizing. The blood will rush to aid in digestion which means you will feel sluggish and tired.

For me lunch is the biggest meal of the day. After eating I turn to a zombie. Unless I have something urgent to do, I don’t function well.

Caffeine or sugar withdrawal and dehydration will cause foggy states.

2. Tiredness and pain

Not getting enough sleep can make you groggy. I used to compensate with caffeine but that only lasted for a short while before I came down crashing.

I do have a bad back and neck so when the nerves are pinched I can’t get comfortable and that makes it impossible to do anything, let alone something inspiring or meaningful.

3. Environment

You won’t be able to motivate yourself when you don’t like your work space (or home environment) or you’re surrounded by distractions.

I can’t function if there is anything on my desk other than what I’m working on or if there is noise. It’s a big blah when I try to work at a coffee shop.

We all have our personal preferences. As you go through your diary you will gain more clarity about the environment that works for you.

The reasons I mentioned here  will sound generic to you. As you dig into your own experiences you will find specific triggers which would fall under any of these causes.

I hope you get a chance to observe and reflect on your blah moments. This can be a powerful exercise in awareness and understanding your tendencies and challenges. I would love to hear from you about your experience.

In the next article we will get into practical action steps to move through the blah state.

Photo courtesy of John Morgan

“Life’s like a play; it’s not the length but the excellence of the acting that matters.” ~Seneca

Excellence is a scarce commodity. It’s becoming harder to find in our so called efficient, fast paced, plastic laden society. And because it’s rare, it’s highly rewarded when found.

We instinctively have an appreciation for the beauty that comes from genuine and skilled effort, even by today’s standards.

The thing that we fail to see about excellence is that it’s scarce by choice—the cumulative choice of the masses to just get by with half assed effort and mediocre results.

We can’t change how everyone acts on this planet. But we can choose to act differently, to become excellent at what we do.

Excellence comes from excel—to do extremely well, to be exceptionally good at or proficient in an activity or subject.

Excellence is:

Focused: You can’t be excellent in everything all of a sudden. You will need to focus your effort on one thing at a time.

Doable: You can become the best you can be if you decide to do so.

Meaningful: What you do has to mean something to you in order to pursue a higher level of proficiency.

Intuitive: You know in your heart what you want to be really good at.

Action: You can’t become good at anything without action, and lots of it.

Excellence brings ease and beauty to whatever you do. It inspires and transforms. The road to success is paved with excellence.

Excellence is not:

Perfect: It is your best at any given moment, which means it changes as you grow.

A destination: You don’t get to excellence. You become excellent. It is a way of life—a way of being—and not a goal.

A three step process to becoming excellent

The three steps below are quite simple but not easy. Take your time and move through the process slowly.

1- Do the best you can.

Doing the best you can means you don’t do things begrudgingly, rushing through one thing so you can jump to the next thing. It means focusing your energy with ease into the action you’re taking without the need for validation or reward.

You get to define your own best and work with it.

2- Make it a habit. Keep doing the best you can.

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. ~Aristotle

Habits are born from doing the same thing over and over. If you do your best every time you do something, you cannot fail. The action becomes part of who you are.

The biggest challenge is to keep going when you feel discouraged and you doubt your abilities. If you keep going, you will get better and better, till you become the best you can be—you master the action.

It is in this step that you transform your talent into a valuable skill that is highly rewarded and appreciated.

3- Do the best you can in everything you do.

Work with the motto: the way you do anything is the way you do everything. Make excellence the rule and not the exception.

You can choose one thing to be excellent at. As time goes by make a conscious choice to be excellent at everything you do.

This doesn’t mean overwhelming yourself and trying to be perfect. On the contrary, you choose a few things to do and do them really well. You own a few excellent items. You work on a few projects and do your best.

This turns excellence into a way of life. You become an excellent parent, spouse, cook, worker, student and so on.

Becoming excellent uplifts your soul to higher elevations of being. The ultimate outcome anyone of us can hope for in this life is to be the best we can be. And excellence is the best way to achieve that.

“Every job is a self-portrait of the person who did it. Autograph your work with excellence.”

The year is almost over—can’t believe it passed so fast. Time flies when you’re having a fun and rewarding experience. And with the end comes a new beginning.

Stepping back is a good way to reflect, gain insight from our experiences and then move forward to what’s next—letting go and starting afresh.

We can of course do this any day or moment. We don’t have to wait till year-end to ponder and learn. The collective pause at the end of the year, however, can be a compelling reason for us to stop and take stock.

Let’s do this with the understanding that we can choose a new start any time.

I’m going to share with you what transpired during the year and what it means to you. Let’s start with promises that I kept and didn’t keep.

Looking back

What I promised at the end of last year was the following:

1. Content. I will focus on content that I hope can inspire you in the smallest of ways to accept and appreciate your experience and truth in this moment.

2. Free report or eBook. This is the least I can do to say thank you for your continued support.

3. Meaningful interaction with you through social media.

I managed to the best of my abilities to keep two of my promises.

I wrote articles from the heart, with the intent of helping in any way I can. Initially I wanted to write more than one article a week but realized that I couldn’t do it while maintaining focus, depth and more importantly having fun while doing it. I managed to write four articles each month at a relaxed pace.

I’ve been very fortunate to have private conversations with many of you. The interactions were inspiring and motivated me to keep going. The best reward for sharing an idea or experience is to know that it affected someone else. It enhances our interactions and deepens our connection.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for being here. I’m very grateful.

The promise that fell by the wayside was writing an eBook or report. I have failed to deliver though it was always nagging at me.

Why did I break my promise?

I have mentioned at least a couple of times my desire to write an eBook. Unfortunately that didn’t materialize and I have no one to blame but myself.

My reasons are by no means an excuse for not delivering on my promise. While none of them is intentional, this is the case most of the time when it comes to promises—to ourselves and others—that we don’t keep.

Confusion in priorities: as much as I wanted to write a book, it obviously wasn’t the most important thing to me. I did not make the time, i.e. give up something else, to make it happen.

Unclear direction: I did not have specific topics or ideas that I wanted to explore in depth as a basis for a book. This resulted in feeling overwhelmed and unmotivated to get started.

Not only did I need a topic, but also I needed measurable steps to deliver (e.g. writing frequency, an outline, number of chapters and words). The measurable steps would not be set in stone, but they would be very effective in maintaining momentum and making progress..

No sense of urgency or a specific deadline: the only thing that would’ve gotten me to face the setbacks at the start is a dose of good old willpower to meet a deadline. Sometimes it’s the only thing to get us started and keeps us going.

As you can see the above three reasons can create a vicious cycle that continues to feed itself unless it’s consciously broken.

How did the theme “less is more” work out?

At the beginning of this year I wrote about themes and how they can guide you during the year. My theme was less is more.

Overall I stuck to my theme. The main areas where I felt visible results were:

• Wrote less articles but with more focus and depth. The readership grew slowly but surely.
• Used social media (Facebook and Twitter) less and had more meaningful interactions.
• Reduced my email volume by 90% from the prior year.
• Spent less time online and more time doing what matters—meditated, exercised, journaled daily, started learning new skills and read more books.
• Cut down on material possessions and new purchases. This is still a work in progress. I have more stuff to give away or sell.

The main area where I fell short personally is music. This is something I need to show up for in the upcoming year.

Hope this year was kind to you and your loved ones. Please take the time to reflect on your journey this year and how you have grown from it.

Looking forward

They say the past cannot be used to predict the future. But we sure can use what we experienced as a guideline for what we’d like to do next.

My new theme for the year reflects a desire to work on what I started or promised in the past.

New theme: Relentless focus

I want to focus on a few projects that mean something to me and eliminate all the noise. Most of the projects I’m referring to are things I’ve started but didn’t complete.

My unrelenting promise to you

I will produce an eBook or report no later than May 17 come hell or high water.

I will continue to write weekly articles and interact with you at the same pace. I feel you have a lot on your plate and if you’re kind enough to give me your attention each week for a few moments I want to make sure that what you read is worth your time and you have ample time to use some of the ideas in your life.

If you have a certain subject that you want me to write about, or include in the book, I’d love to hear from you.

Personally

On a personal level I would like to complete an accelerated learning program. And leaving the most challenging for last: music. This desire is very dear to my heart but is the most intimidating. I am not going to talk about it unless I show meaningful progress that I can share with you.

That is it. These are my main three targets for the upcoming year along with maintaining my daily routine activities and work.

Please take some time and think about what the upcoming year is going to be for you. Pick a word or theme. It doesn’t matter as long as you have a general sense of direction for your year.

Look at your life and determine the areas where you’d like to grow. And keep one thing in mind: it is your journey. You set your compass and sail in the direction that suits you and no one else.

Thank you for your continued support and encouragement. It has been a pleasure and a privilege sharing this space with you. I wish you a peaceful and prosperous new year.

With much love and appreciation.

I never worked harder than I had to, and that was a problem. He wanted me to think about the magnitude of the commitment I was going to have to make if I really wanted to pursue music as a career. He was serious about working with me and teaching me the ropes, but I was going to have to show up for my own party.

This is what Canadian Artist Jann Arden did to get to where she is today. She committed five years of showing up every single day, writing songs, recording and honing her skills before she released her first album in 1993.

If you want to move, in a meaningful way, towards your desires and aspirations, you’ve got to show up for your own party—the party of your heart and soul.

They say the majority of success comes from just showing up. Today let’s explore this concept in more detail.

What does it mean to show up?

It means that you physically show up, fully committed to the task or project, no matter what. No excuses, buts or ifs.

The essential elements of showing up

1. Full alignment

Before you show up you need to align yourself—mind, heart and body—with your desire to pursue a certain goal or passion.

You can’t be committed and show up if you’re conflicted about your desire. You need to be fully and completely focused on this single desire.

This is the time where you ask yourself:

• Why do I want this?
• Would it matter to me in 5 years?
• How would I feel if I didn’t commit to this goal?
• How would I feel when I get there?
• What does it mean for me to live my dream?
• What am I scared of when it comes to this passion?
• What do I feel is lacking for me to make this happen?

Look deeply into your reservations and limiting beliefs. Find counter points to neutralize them. Don’t dwell, trust your answers and move on.

And remember fear is part of life. We don’t need to conquer it. We just need to keep going in spite of fear and doubt.

2. Plan, set up and invite the universe

Just like any party you host, you need a plan for your soul party.

In this step you create a detailed vision of what you want to accomplish. What is the ultimate goal? What steps do you need to start moving?  What would it take for you to start with the first step?

Then get the tools you need, and set a space for you to do your work. This would be your sacred space where you do your thing.

Don’t get bogged down with finding the best tools and the best setup. Get the essentials that you need and move on.

For example if you want to write, get a pen and some paper or a word processor on your computer. Later you can add a dictionary or any other resource you need. Focus on the basics.

Keep your space aligned with your desire and your personal style. If you don’t like clutter or noise for example, make sure you have a neat and quiet area to work in.

Decide on the time where you need to be at your party. This time is not negotiable and has to be specific. Imagine sending an invitation to a party stating the time as when I’m ready. No one, including you, is going to know when that is.

When I feel like it, when I’m ready, someday, are not dates and times. They are excuses for not showing up.

When you have your space ready and your time set, invite all of the creative and supportive energies of life to accompany you in your journey.

3. Physically be there

This is the beginning of the real journey where the rubber hits the road. You need to go to your place of work and be there every single day—or at least the majority of days. The thing about showing up is that it’s hard. It takes determination and conviction.

In the book War of Art  Steven Pressfield states:

It’s not the writing part that’s hard. What’s hard is sitting down to write.

Sit down and allow the universe to inspire you. And keep doing it day in and day out. If you don’t do this, you will be missing out on your party.

4. Take action

Take single focused action in the direction of your desire.

If you’re a writer, write. If you want to learn the piano, play it. If you want to be fit, start moving.  One single word, key stroke or step at a time.

Be open to what comes to you in the process. Act on inspiration or what feels right at the moment.

If you don’t know what to do, don’t despair. As long as you continue to show up and keep the creative doors open, inspiration will come.

Don’t quit your party. If you don’t know what to write, stare at the blank page till something comes to you. If you’re stuck in your piano lesson, break it down to one simple note and play that. You will get unstuck sooner or later.

5. Trust

Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

Not knowing how things will turn out is one of the hardest challenges. You will have doubts about your abilities. Resistance and fear will creep in the moment you start wavering. The voice of naysayers will be amplified a thousand times in your mind.

Have faith and trust that you’re on the right path for you and that you’re doing the best you can.

Things will change as you keep going. It’s part of the journey. You won’t anticipate every change and won’t be prepared for every challenge. But you will deal and move on.

There are so many times where I don’t know what I want to write about or I start a draft, then the next day I feel compelled to write about something else. And I have no idea how I’m going to weave a few words and ideas together.

Usually the actual writing turns out to be easier than the exaggerated obstacles in my head. Once I start, words start to flow. When I get stuck, I leave space for the thought or idea. When I come back to it later, the words tend to bring themselves to me.

The beauty of trust is this: the more you trust, the better you feel, the more fun you have, the more you keep going. And when you reach that stage, nothing can stand in your way. Your success is inevitable.

Keep going. Repeat steps 3 to 5 and revise 1 and 2 based on the progress you made.

What party am I showing up for? And what’s next?

Personally I’ve been showing up to write these blog articles. I set a specific target for publishing four posts per month, no matter what.

The tools I’m using are a text editor, word processor and Windows Live Writer. I have a quiet space in the office where I like to write or in the living room by the fireplace when it’s really cold. On writing days, the writing becomes my main mission. Other than normal routine tasks, I don’t commit to anything on that day.

I have not been as committed to music as I’d like to be. So the next party is going to be about music. I want to learn more and start refining the music I’ve created. I will show up, in spite of the overwhelm and all the aspects of music composition and production that I know nothing about—yet.

Before I end this article, here are a couple of books I highly recommend for anyone who wants to pursue a creative endeavor.

Recommended reading

If you want to motivate yourself and face your challenges, read the following books.

• War of Art
• Do the Work

Steve Pressfield dissects resistance and gives you enough ammunition to move past it so you can show up to do your work.

Showing up is the antidote to resistance and inertia. It’s hard in the beginning, but with time it gets easier. It becomes a habit—a routine—like brushing your teeth. This is when action starts to flow with ease, with minimal struggle and less need for willpower.

When you show up, all of life shows up to support you.

Photo courtesy of Eduardo Merille

We are drowning in information but starved for knowledge. ~John Naisbitt

How many pieces of information do you go through in a day? More importantly, how much of it do you use in your life?

I ask myself these two questions every day.

There is an overload of information out there. I read at least 5 blogs posts a day and later in the evening I read part of a book for about an hour.

Most of the stuff I read is very useful to me. The thing is: what do I do with all this information?

Gathering or reading a lot about a subject doesn’t make us knowledgeable, unless we use this information.

I can’t tell you how many articles are bookmarked with a note that says interesting, check it out and do later. The same applies to books. I start a text file for all the stuff I think I want to use from a book.

A few notes about books and articles are not a problem. But when the pile of notes keeps getting bigger and bigger, the interesting information becomes a drag. Nothing gets used and the stuff just sits there.

The one idea

After feeling overwhelmed with all the information I have to process, I decided to just pick one idea and forget about the rest.  I created an archive folder and moved all the old notes to it so I don’t have to worry about them. I figured if I haven’t dealt with them, they were not that important to me. I deleted the archive folder later.

How does the one idea work?

Once you read an article, and it may have 10 things you can do, pick one and run with it. You may say but I want to keep going and apply the rest. How many can you apply at one single attempt?

Pick one. Write it down. Reflect on it for a few minutes. Does it excite you? Do you feel it’s something that you want to use in your life?

Go for it and forget about the rest. As you use it, you’ll know when it’s time to pick a new idea. You may also find out that this idea is not working for you. And that’s okay. Now you know, because you used it.

After mastering an idea or dropping it, move on to the next one. And repeat the same process.

A note about reading

Before moving further, I’d like to share with you something about reading that makes a big difference. Read with a purpose. Engage with the material you’re reading. Why are you reading an article or a book? Is it for entertainment? To learn a new skill? To solve a problem (what’s the problem)?

The more specific you are about your purpose, the more your subconscious mind will guide you as you read.

When you read with a purpose, you become an active reader. You will be open to the ideas the writer is sharing with you. You will become more skillful at picking ideas that suit you.

What happens to all the other useful information?

As you read more articles and more books, you will have more ideas than just the one you want to start with. What do you do with the rest of the ideas?

Keep a log of ideas

Write down the idea you’d like to use in a notebook or a log.

I created a log as a word document you can download here. Use it if you like or create your own. I also attached an example here. (Right click and download the files to your computer).

Please keep in mind, with every tool you use, you need to keep things simple and maintain your system.

Guidelines for keeping ideas

In order to get results and avoid shuffling things around, create your rules for keeping ideas and stick to them. Consider the following:

• Write the idea in the simplest form possible with the least amount of words.
• Limit the number of ideas that go into your log. Mine is set right now at 20. If I need to add more, I’ll get rid of one (usually the oldest).
• With every idea you add, include the date. If the idea stays in your log for a long time, let it go.
• Review your log on a regular basis and clear out old stuff.

What to do with your reading material

Instead of having countless articles and books, you’ll have one document with the information you want to use.

You can safely get rid of all the articles and just add a link to them in your ideas log.

When it comes to books, it’s a bit harder, especially if you don’t own the book or you’re planning on giving it away after you’re done reading. In this case, write the idea, the book title and page number. Even if you give the book away, you can find it at your library or borrow it from someone else. Resist the temptation to hold on to books—I admit I’m still working on this one.

Trust your intuition and inner guidance. Keep the ideas that you want to work with and let the rest go.

Imagine if you just implemented 12 ideas per year (one per month) what a difference this would make in your life. Of course, you can do more or less. It doesn’t matter as long as you do something.