The other day while watching TV I heard this expression.

A good life is the best revenge.

It got me thinking, what is a good life? What makes life good or bad? Is there such a thing as a bad life?

Is a good life a meaningful life? Is a good life one that offers value to others and society?

I believe every life has inherent meaning and value. The fact that someone is alive has all the meaning and value—even if we fail to see it sometimes.

A good life is something that extends beyond the basics. It’s what distinguishes you from me and others. It’s personal and unique.

So is it defined by personal success and achievement?

What is success in this case? Is it having a high powered career? Fame? Money? A healthy well toned body? A large following of fans? Winning a prize of some sort?

I don’t think so. All these things can be a double edged sword—causing as much suffering as pleasure.

After contemplating for a while (and like most things in life, my views are subjective), I came to this conclusion.

A good life is a life that is made up of a lot of good moments. And the good moments are the result of certain choices we make and actions we take.

The good life code

The following three guidelines will ensure you have lots of good moments.

Living authentically and truthfully

You live honestly and in harmony with your truth. What you say or do reflects who you are.

You live from the heart and soul. You follow your joy, igniting your passion for life. You live on purpose—your purpose and your life, not someone else’s view of what your life should be.

It’s about doing what you love for the sake of doing it. The work and experience are the reward. Material or emotional compensation is the icing on the cake. This is something you love to do no matter what.

When you’re authentic, you open up to life. You restore your sense of wonder. You awaken the fun and adventurous kid within.

We all have genetic markers that define our physical traits. I believe we have a cosmic marker that identifies our nonphysical traits.

A good life is one where you live by your cosmic marker—your one of a kind being.

Meaningful connections and relationships

We all want to love and be loved. We want to have a genuine connection with the people around us.

A good life means you have solid relationships based on love, trust and mutual respect. It’s the kind of relationship that allows you to be who you are.

That doesn’t mean there is no dysfunction.

A true connection is one that transcends dysfunction. It is one that: allows for mistakes, confronts, forgives and embraces. It is strong enough to withstand the turbulence of our dark side.

Your close relationships are the ones you have without motives or pretense. They are with the people who will truly miss you when you’re gone. They will feel the void you leave behind—and they are never the same because of you. Your memory lives through them.

Such relationships are precious because they’re rare. We’re lucky if we have a handful of them. A meaningful connection enriches your life beyond measure.

A life of ease

I define ease as the opposite of struggle. It is when you’re just rolling with life, minding your business.

To be at ease doesn’t mean that you won’t experience pain—it’s humanly impossible. It means that you allow yourself to feel the pain, and for the pain to serve its purpose. You lick your wounds and give yourself time to heal.

You don’t resist and suffer needlessly. You actively surrender to life. You grow from your pain as much as you do from success. You don’t need to feel bad for yourself, resent others or feel jealous.

You don’t waste your energy worrying about what’s outside of your control, what others are thinking, saying, doing or not doing.  You allow others to stay on their path and you stay on yours. You trust life as it is.

When you need to take a stand, you do it because it’s the right thing to do, not because it’s the popular thing to do. You do it without fanfare or judgment. You’re in your zone!

Nothing is more contagious than a person at ease. You can sense it a mile away and it rubs off on you pretty quickly.

To sum up

A life of ease, doing what you want when you want and having a blast with the people you love the most. And when things go wrong, you embrace your humanity, do what you can, lean on the people you love and let the rest go.

This is the good life—a life with a strong mental hammock, tied to deep rooted relationship trees and enriched by a clear emotional blue sky.

A good life is not the best revenge but the greatest inspiration.

“To live one’s own life is still the best way of life, always was, and always will be.” ~ Henry Miller

“Come to the edge, he said. They said: We are afraid. Come to the edge, he said. They came. He pushed them and they flew.” ~ Guillaume Apolinaire

Do you believe in your ability to fly? More importantly, are you flying? Or are you stuck?

One of the biggest (if not the biggest) reasons for not living your dreams and realizing your potential is fear.

Fear is a basic and primitive emotion. It can be a protective friend alerting us so we can respond to physical danger.

But it can be our biggest nightmare stopping us in our tracks—trapped and unable to take meaningful action towards our desires. This is the type of fear we need to face so we can break the status quo cycle and move in a new direction.

The first step in any change is to accept where we are. In this case, identifying what we’re afraid of. Then doing something about it.

My friend Tess Marshall released a new course about fear. Today I want to share with you some of my thoughts and experiences about fear. I also did an interview with Tess about her new program Take Your Fear and Shove It. I hope you find the information useful.

A holistic view of fear

Personally, I don’t think we need to crush or launch war on fear. What we need is to accept where we are. We need to look within to understand how our fears emerged and how we can move through them.

Here are the main points I want to highlight about fear.

Fear is not necessarily an isolated emotion.

Sometimes fear is just that. We feel scared of something and we don’t know why. When I was a kid I had a paralyzing fear of cats. I can’t tell you why I had this fear.

But most fears are related to other emotions and negative experiences that our mind amplifies to fear.

For example, fear of rejection can stem from an incident (or incidents) when someone said no to you. You might’ve projected that into a blank statement that I’m not good enough. Then found evidence (we  find what we’re looking for) of that statement till it became a deep rooted belief.

Also you might’ve developed resentment for the person who said no to you. The resentment is stronger when the person has significant presence in your life like a parent, a sibling, or a friend.

I experienced this when I was around 10 years old. My father said no to me more than a few times. For the longest time I believed that I’m not worthy.

One can say some fears (failure, success, abandonment …etc.) come in a package of emotions and limiting beliefs. It’s important to dig and find out as much as we can about all the emotions and beliefs in the package.

Fear is costly.

As much as our mind tries to justify our fear, we know fair well that we miss out on opportunities of growth because of fear. The cost of opportunities can be financial, physical or social.

But the highest costs are internal: a sense of peace, wellbeing and faith in our own abilities and worth.

Reality is kinder than our imagined fears.

Fear is not subtle. It amplifies a negative outcome to the nth degree. Fear does rob you of believing in your abilities. Fear is like a fire that consumes anything good in your life and emits more insecurities and reasons to be afraid.

But when we step out of fear and face the situation in real life, it usually isn’t as bad as we thought. We manage better than we ever imagined.

To face my fear of cats, my mother got a cat and that was that. I freaked out for a bit, then got used to it—way easier than my fearful thoughts.

Action is the most effective tool to face fears.

You can’t put your fears and abilities to the test until you do something—anything.

My fear of cats was put to test after living with a cat.

Small changes are all you need.

It’s a misconception that when we face fear, we need to force ourselves to take big action steps, jumping into the abyss of the new and unfamiliar.

While it’s possible to take a giant step to handle your fears, you can take small steps and get effective results. I prefer this approach because it doesn’t rattle our protective lizard brain—i.e. less resistance and excuses.

For example to deal with the fear of rejection, I formed new friendships. I asked for help from others and I offered to help others. Is my fear completely gone? No, but I’m getting there, step by step.

How to be bold and shine bright by overcoming your fears

The course Take This Fear and Shove It is quite comprehensive and can be a great resource to deal with your fears, in a gradual step by step process.

It covers a wide range of topics in the following 8 modules.

1. Understanding Fear
2. Four Methods to Dissolve Fear
3. You Are Stronger than Your Fear
4. Manage Your Fear
5. When Bad Things Happen
6. Step Into Your Power
7. The Fearless Life
8. Living Love in a Culture of Fear

After going through the course material I had the following conversation with Tess.

You write about fearless living on your blog. Offering a detailed course on fear is a natural progression to the evolution of your message. What inspired you to have a platform dedicated to the message of overcoming fear and living boldly?

I think people are more fearful than ever due to our economic times. It’s so easy to fall into negative expectations for our future. If we can work through our fears, we can step up to the plate and offer the world our gifts and talents. That’s a better use of our energy.

The ones who play big and walk boldly into the future are going to be a big part of creating the solutions everyone is looking for. I want to be a part of creating a better way.

What’s the most important aspect of fear that you want to bring to our attention?

That fear is an illusion. We hold back because we want to be safe, but there is no such thing as safety. Who knows what will happen in the next moment, hour, or day? Nobody.

We only have to examine our thoughts, look for the story that we’re telling ourselves. Then we can change our story. We can train our minds to expect the best.

Your course is different from anything I have seen. It goes beyond understanding and dissolving fear. It extends to other areas of human potential and happiness. Why did you add these parts and how do they relate to fear?

Thank you! I think it comes from my work as a therapist and my own personal growth. When we spend our time living in fear, anxiety, and doubt it’s impossible to be happy. When we are coming from a state of love, happiness, and joy it’s impossible to be afraid.

Every moment we make a choice on how we are going to be. And we get it wrong, the beauty of life is that we can choose again, as many times as we want.

I’m far from perfect. Want to hear something funny? Hubs has been proofreading all my guest posts. When I get myself worked up over nonsense he says, “I was just reading about that somewhere—guess where. Then he gives me my own advice back! We’ve really had fun with it!

When you give the people around you permission to hold you accountable in a gentle way it can work wonders for your relationships.

How can living in the present moment dissipate fearful thoughts?

I think it’s very difficult to be fearful in the present moment. Think about how strangers help others in dangerous situations. In the present moment they don’t stand around being afraid. They will jump in freezing water to save a drowning man.

You speak a lot about love and kindness in the course material. You actually describe other emotions as derivatives of either love or fear. How can love help us in dealing with fear and moving past it?

This is an example…When I’m in a state of fear it’s easy for me to get in my adult children’s business. In a fearful state I think I know what’s right for them.

Wrong! At that point I can catch myself and realize I don’t know what’s right for myself half of the time, how can I possibly know what’s right from them? So instead of saying anything, I can stay in my own business in my own backyard! That’s love!

Who is this course for and what do you hope the readers will gain from going through it?

This course is for anyone who is ready to replace fear, rejection, envy etc. with more joy and happiness. We have one precious life. I want to fill mine with fun and wild adventure. Anyone who wants the same would be wise to get this course.

What is the one action that we can take today to move forward and be bolder?

Buy the course Take Your Fear and Shove It! And while you’re working through it don’t forget to breathe.

I’m very grateful to Tess for taking the time to answer my questions. She walks the talk and generously shares her experiences and knowledge.

I hope you feel motivated to face your fears. The most important thing to start with is to do something.

If you are ready to do something about fear and live more boldly, check out Tess Marshall’s new course, Take Your Fear and Shove It!

 “The moment in between what you once were, and who you are now becoming, is where the dance of life really takes place.”  ~ Barbara De Angelis

It’s time for you to dance—your most special and joyous dance—free and unencumbered by fear and doubt.

Photo courtesy of Or Hiltch

I never worked harder than I had to, and that was a problem. He wanted me to think about the magnitude of the commitment I was going to have to make if I really wanted to pursue music as a career. He was serious about working with me and teaching me the ropes, but I was going to have to show up for my own party.

This is what Canadian Artist Jann Arden did to get to where she is today. She committed five years of showing up every single day, writing songs, recording and honing her skills before she released her first album in 1993.

If you want to move, in a meaningful way, towards your desires and aspirations, you’ve got to show up for your own party—the party of your heart and soul.

They say the majority of success comes from just showing up. Today let’s explore this concept in more detail.

What does it mean to show up?

It means that you physically show up, fully committed to the task or project, no matter what. No excuses, buts or ifs.

The essential elements of showing up

1. Full alignment

Before you show up you need to align yourself—mind, heart and body—with your desire to pursue a certain goal or passion.

You can’t be committed and show up if you’re conflicted about your desire. You need to be fully and completely focused on this single desire.

This is the time where you ask yourself:

• Why do I want this?
• Would it matter to me in 5 years?
• How would I feel if I didn’t commit to this goal?
• How would I feel when I get there?
• What does it mean for me to live my dream?
• What am I scared of when it comes to this passion?
• What do I feel is lacking for me to make this happen?

Look deeply into your reservations and limiting beliefs. Find counter points to neutralize them. Don’t dwell, trust your answers and move on.

And remember fear is part of life. We don’t need to conquer it. We just need to keep going in spite of fear and doubt.

2. Plan, set up and invite the universe

Just like any party you host, you need a plan for your soul party.

In this step you create a detailed vision of what you want to accomplish. What is the ultimate goal? What steps do you need to start moving?  What would it take for you to start with the first step?

Then get the tools you need, and set a space for you to do your work. This would be your sacred space where you do your thing.

Don’t get bogged down with finding the best tools and the best setup. Get the essentials that you need and move on.

For example if you want to write, get a pen and some paper or a word processor on your computer. Later you can add a dictionary or any other resource you need. Focus on the basics.

Keep your space aligned with your desire and your personal style. If you don’t like clutter or noise for example, make sure you have a neat and quiet area to work in.

Decide on the time where you need to be at your party. This time is not negotiable and has to be specific. Imagine sending an invitation to a party stating the time as when I’m ready. No one, including you, is going to know when that is.

When I feel like it, when I’m ready, someday, are not dates and times. They are excuses for not showing up.

When you have your space ready and your time set, invite all of the creative and supportive energies of life to accompany you in your journey.

3. Physically be there

This is the beginning of the real journey where the rubber hits the road. You need to go to your place of work and be there every single day—or at least the majority of days. The thing about showing up is that it’s hard. It takes determination and conviction.

In the book War of Art  Steven Pressfield states:

It’s not the writing part that’s hard. What’s hard is sitting down to write.

Sit down and allow the universe to inspire you. And keep doing it day in and day out. If you don’t do this, you will be missing out on your party.

4. Take action

Take single focused action in the direction of your desire.

If you’re a writer, write. If you want to learn the piano, play it. If you want to be fit, start moving.  One single word, key stroke or step at a time.

Be open to what comes to you in the process. Act on inspiration or what feels right at the moment.

If you don’t know what to do, don’t despair. As long as you continue to show up and keep the creative doors open, inspiration will come.

Don’t quit your party. If you don’t know what to write, stare at the blank page till something comes to you. If you’re stuck in your piano lesson, break it down to one simple note and play that. You will get unstuck sooner or later.

5. Trust

Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

Not knowing how things will turn out is one of the hardest challenges. You will have doubts about your abilities. Resistance and fear will creep in the moment you start wavering. The voice of naysayers will be amplified a thousand times in your mind.

Have faith and trust that you’re on the right path for you and that you’re doing the best you can.

Things will change as you keep going. It’s part of the journey. You won’t anticipate every change and won’t be prepared for every challenge. But you will deal and move on.

There are so many times where I don’t know what I want to write about or I start a draft, then the next day I feel compelled to write about something else. And I have no idea how I’m going to weave a few words and ideas together.

Usually the actual writing turns out to be easier than the exaggerated obstacles in my head. Once I start, words start to flow. When I get stuck, I leave space for the thought or idea. When I come back to it later, the words tend to bring themselves to me.

The beauty of trust is this: the more you trust, the better you feel, the more fun you have, the more you keep going. And when you reach that stage, nothing can stand in your way. Your success is inevitable.

Keep going. Repeat steps 3 to 5 and revise 1 and 2 based on the progress you made.

What party am I showing up for? And what’s next?

Personally I’ve been showing up to write these blog articles. I set a specific target for publishing four posts per month, no matter what.

The tools I’m using are a text editor, word processor and Windows Live Writer. I have a quiet space in the office where I like to write or in the living room by the fireplace when it’s really cold. On writing days, the writing becomes my main mission. Other than normal routine tasks, I don’t commit to anything on that day.

I have not been as committed to music as I’d like to be. So the next party is going to be about music. I want to learn more and start refining the music I’ve created. I will show up, in spite of the overwhelm and all the aspects of music composition and production that I know nothing about—yet.

Before I end this article, here are a couple of books I highly recommend for anyone who wants to pursue a creative endeavor.

Recommended reading

If you want to motivate yourself and face your challenges, read the following books.

• War of Art
• Do the Work

Steve Pressfield dissects resistance and gives you enough ammunition to move past it so you can show up to do your work.

Showing up is the antidote to resistance and inertia. It’s hard in the beginning, but with time it gets easier. It becomes a habit—a routine—like brushing your teeth. This is when action starts to flow with ease, with minimal struggle and less need for willpower.

When you show up, all of life shows up to support you.

Photo courtesy of Eduardo Merille

Life as we know it is the summation of beginnings and endings. It is the transformation of energy and matter—the dance of evolution.

If we look at our own existence, we realize that it is built and continues to grow on a foundation of relationships. The physical body is the visible manifestation of energy and matter uniting to produce the unique being that is you.

Our experiences and memories are a reflection of our relationship with nature, objects, other people and ourselves.

As we all know too well, a relationship that beings will end one day—sooner or later. This is part of the magic and mystery of life.

In most cases the ending is painful and unwelcomed. The holiday season is a wonderful opportunity to reflect on the relationships that have ended and the possibilities of what is yet to come.

While the writing below is mostly focused on our relationship with others, it can apply to our relationship with ourselves and with our environment.

Acceptance

I can’t remember a time when I was completely prepared for a relationship to end. The end comes in different shapes and forms but one result—it is over.

It is usually hard to fully grasp what happened. Life as we know it has changed and we need to allow ourselves time to adapt to the new reality.

The only thing that we can do is to allow the grieving process to take its course and for us to accept that life is never going to be the same.

Closure

When you accept, you put yourself in the driver seat and steer your life towards closure.

You choose to close this chapter. What was is over—regardless of why and how.  You are no longer bound to the regrets of the past or the “what ifs” of the future.

And the best part about closure is that it’s always up to you. No one can take it away from you. When you decide to let go and move on, no one can stop you—other than you.

Closure is a gift. You let go of what was, and you open up to what could be. It is the door to new beginnings.

New beginnings

As hard as it may seem to let go and move on, take solace in knowing that it is an opportunity for something new to emerge.

Saying goodbye to what was creates a space for what could be. With every birth there is a death and after every death there is an opportunity for new life.

When we let go, we feel the space that this relationship has left behind. It is in that space that other beginnings are born. They may not necessarily be the same type of relationship. But they will be something that augments our journey and moves us forward. The universe always trades up.

This year I lost a childhood friend who died in a car accident. I also lost a connection to a family member who decided to drop all communication. There were no planned goodbyes and that’s okay. Time allowed me to find closure and accept where I am.

This pain is a reminder of our humanity and the inevitable ending that’s intertwined with a new beginning. This is the rhythm of the dance of life.

Beginnings and endings are nothing but an expressive transformation of energy that is within us and all around us.

Today I invite you to find closure and let go of what’s holding you in the past. Honor the memory of what was. Give yourself the gift of closure and open up to new possibilities.

As Dr. Seuss put it:

“Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.”

A book is the only place in which you can examine a fragile thought without breaking it, or explore an explosive idea without fear it will go off in your face.  It is one of the few havens remaining where a man’s mind can get both provocation and privacy.  ~Edward P. Morgan

I fell in love with books the day I was introduced to them—the words, the images, the binding … everything. Books have a unique ability to transport us to an entirely new world. We learn, explore, laugh, cry and escape with books.

In today’s world we have more opportunities than ever to read books in new and exciting ways. We don’t have to go to a bookstore or to the library. We can get the book we want by pressing a button on our computer or mobile device and within seconds it’s on our screen.

Today I want to talk about reading eBooks. Why? Because I have found tremendous joy in reading in this format and with that joy comes a sense of peace and gratitude. My hope is to share this joy with you.

Books in print changed the world and allowed so many people to open up their minds and hearts. Digital books took it to a whole new level. There is unprecedented access to all types of books. While accessibility is a good thing, too many choices can overwhelm the best of us.

To take advantage of this technology and availability and avoid feeling overwhelmed or confused, we can focus on the basic formats and choices.

The main eBook formats

Digital reading is not a new concept. It has been around for more than a decade. I remember the first books I read were on my Palm Pilot and I thought that was amazing. Over the years so many formats of eBooks evolved. The main three formats that I use and are popular among book readers are:

1. Adobe PDF

This is the most common format for eBooks that are released by bloggers. This format is used extensively in generating digital reports as well. PDF formatting offers visually stunning designs and realistic layouts with images and tables.

You can get Adobe Reader for free and read books on your computer. Mobile devices also offer a variety of free and paid apps for reading PDF files.

The only drawback to PDF files is that when you increase the font size, you may have to scroll and that can be bothersome when you’re reading a large book.

2. Kindle: AZW/MOBI

Mobipocket (MOBI) is an older format upon which Amazon kindle format (AZW) was designed. The kindle app can read non-DRM MOBI books plus the proprietary kindle formats.

The design of the book is not as important as the text in this format. The focus is on the text size and how it flows on your screen. This makes text easy to read and the pages turn seamlessly.

The downside is that certain tables and images may not come out very clear. Images formatted for digital reading can be enlarged for viewing then closed to continue reading.

3. EPUB

This is a newer technology than mobipocket. It is becoming more and more popular. Apple iBooks, Kobo, Sony, Nook and Google are among the adopters of EPUB format. The apps developed by each company have different features though.

Like the kindle, the book’s layout focuses more on text and ease of reading vs. visual design.

Which format is better?

I think all serve a purpose. The PDF format is useful for books and reports that have a lot of formatting. I prefer to read PDF on a larger screen (on a computer, instead of a smart phone for example).

MOBI is good if you run it through your kindle app. I find it loads faster than ePub and the pages turn quicker. Of course this might be the kindle app and not the type of file.

ePub is good because it is becoming more widely used, which means you will have more options. You can find a lot of books for free in this format.

How to read eBooks: Hardware

There are different ways you can read eBooks. You can invest in a device or just use what you have.

1. Computer: Whether you use a desktop or laptop, you can read eBooks in the main three formats above.

2. e-Reader: These are devices that are specifically designed for reading eBooks. Each device supports its format an PDF files. The most popular are the Amazon kindle, Kobo, Sony Reader, and Nook.

3. Tablet: Tablets are becoming more popular and offer ways for you to read all formats on your device. You can read your books on an Android tablet, BlackBerry PlayBook, or the Apple iPad. In recent months Amazon, Kobo and Nook started offering their own tablets as well.

4. Smart phone: Applications have been developed for most smart phones and can be used to read eBooks in all formats—Android phones, BlackBerry, iPhone/iPod touch, Nokia and Windows 7 all have apps to read books.

How to read eBooks: Software/apps & bookstores

Which apps to use? This is a tough question because each device functions differently and unfortunately certain companies don’t play nice with each other.

For example, the kindle app works differently on an Android device than on Apple because of the latter’s restriction which doesn’t allow users to buy books straight from the app on their Apple devices.

Here are the apps I use.

Amazon kindle

I’m not a big fan of Amazon’s DRM control, but this is overshadowed by its competitive advantage.

Amazon started as an online bookstore. It offers low prices and probably the largest selection of books. Buying a book is quick and easy. Within seconds the book is downloaded to your device. Amazon’s Whispersync technology works in the background to sync your reading on all your devices.

And as mentioned above, the kindle app is available in a lot of formats to support using different devices. Amazon also introduced the cloud reader which allows you to access your library on a web browser instead of an app. This gives you one more way to read your books.

Kobo

If you want to go the ePub route, I think Kobo can be a good choice. Their pricing is reasonable (slightly higher than Amazon sometimes) and they offer a wide range of books.

Kobo also offers a lot of free public domain books which you can download to your app. It also works on different platforms which syncs your books on different devices.

iBooks

I use the app on the iPad and iPhone for reading free books from Apple or DRM free books in ePub format. New books are more expensive than other providers. Unlike kindle and Kobo, the books can only be read on Apple mobile devices.

EPUB Reader

This is a Firefox extension for reading ePub books. It’s a great way to read your books on your computer. You can add bookmarks, change the font size (it can be really large) but you can’t add notes or highlight text.

Other stores

I have not personally used those apps but thought they’re worth mentioning.

Nook: It looks very comparable to Kobo.

Sony Reader: Sony offers a large selection.  The app doesn’t work on all platforms. It works on PCs and Macs and Android devices.

Google ebookstore: Google now offers books at reasonable prices. It has an app that works with Android and Apple mobile devices but not your computer. You can use a web browser to read on your computer.

Practical use, issues and considerations

I have a few notes I want to share with you to make your digital reading experience easier and more enjoyable.

Test before you buy

Don’t buy anything new before you do your research. If you’re just curious about reading books, download the kindle app and the kobo app to your computer and see how you feel. You can also do the same thing on your smart phone.

If you choose to buy a reader or a tablet, do your research about the device and what it has to offer. Consider other uses for your device before you decide on the size. Most tablets are between 7” (smaller and lighter) and 10” (larger with bigger display). Go to a store and test one if you can; check the reading app, enlarge the text, change the font and background to see how it works.

The two tablets that I work with are a 10” iPad and a 7” BlackBerry PlayBook. I enjoy them both.

Don’t buy any books before you feel comfortable with the platform. Most apps provide you with free books. Read the free books or at least flip through the pages and change some of the features to determine if you like it.

Reading app features

The reading apps on your devices have different features. The most common features are: bookmarking, search, dictionary, note taking, highlighting and sharing.

Think of what are the most important to you. Also remember that the same app can have different features on different devices. For example, you can copy text on the kindle PC but you can’t do that on your iPhone app.

DRM

The eBooks you buy through Amazon, Kobo, Apple or most traditional book sellers and publishers come with a restriction or what they call DRM (Digital Rights Management).This mechanism places restrictions on what you can do with the book you buy. In most cases, you can’t move the book, lend it to a friend, or convert it to another format.

The issue of restricting access is controversial. Personally I feel the underlying assumption behind such measures is that people will steal if they’re allowed to. In effect publishers are saying that most of their customers are thieves. What I know of human nature is that most people will do the right thing—a few will steal, but not the majority.

Such restrictions created a motivation to develop DRM stripping software, which may be legal or illegal—depending on the intent of the user.

Alternatives to DRM books

There are sites that provide DRM free books which means you can do whatever you want with them. Scroll to the middle of the page on the link for books without DRM.

Instead of buying eBooks, you can borrow them from a library. This is something I have not done but intend on trying once I’m done with the books I have.

Uploading DRM free books to your app

You can use MOBI DRM free books with your kindle app. On your computer double click on the file; the program will pick it up and open your book. I use EPUB reader (Firefox extension) to read ePub files.

On your mobile device, the best way I found is to email the book to myself, then open the email on my tablet. From there I can choose to download the book to kindle if it’s MOBI or to iBooks or Kobo if it’s in ePub format. This may not work on all devices.

eBook library management and conversion

I personally rely on the kindle app for most of my books. When I download free public domain books, I delete them after reading. So I don’t need a library.

The most popular software to organize your digital book collection is Calibre. It picks up most formats. It also can convert eBooks to different formats (DRM free only). You can convert MOBI to ePub or vice versa. You can also convert PDF to MOBI or ePub. This is a very useful feature if you want to read a text based PDF without having to keep scrolling.

Another useful conversion tool is on the web. 2EPUB is an awesome tool to convert different documents into eBook formats. And the best part is that you don’t have to download an app.

I hope you find this article useful. You don’t have to use all the tools or consider all the things written here. Just pick one or two options that you feel will work for you.

Anyone who says they have only one life to live must not know how to read a book.  ~Author Unknown

Books are one of humanity’s best gifts to itself—they are a resource of wealth that keeps on giving. The value of a book is derived from application, or from the enjoyment of escaping on an adventure where words and imagination dance on paper (or digital screen).

Give yourself some time this holiday season to enjoy a book. Let the words capture your imagination and take you to another world. Happy digital reading!

Photo courtesy of Tristan

In the previous article we talked about the importance of gratitude and started with the first 15 days of our adventure.

Today the journey continues with another 15 ideas of things we can be grateful for. Choose the ones that resonate with you and replace others with your own. The most important thing is to focus on something to be grateful for every day. Here’s the next 15 days.

16. Work/career

Choose to focus today on the work you do and what values you derive from it. If you think you don’t like your job, think of things that you like—the pay, supporting your family, your coworkers, or getting a chance to leave the house and see other people.

Reflect on all the jobs you’ve had and career choices you’ve made so far. What did you learn from each experience? How did you change and grow?

17. People in your life

We are social animals and our lives are intertwined with others in so many ways.

Who are the important people in your life right now? Why are they important? How do you feel about them? What positive impact do they have on you?

18. People who moved on

Life is in constant motion and our social environment keeps changing with it.

Reflect back on the people who were part of your life at one point and either passed on or the relationship ended for whatever reason.

People like your teachers, school buddies, previous coworkers, past romantic relationships, family members, and friends. What did you learn from the relationship? Who inspired you and how? If you were to see this person again and can only speak to them in positive terms, what would you say?

19. People who influenced you

These are the people and role models that you may have met (or not). Maybe you saw a story on Oprah, or read a book or a biography and felt inspired.

What are the things you’re thankful for from your role models and inspiring individuals?

20. Art and entertainment

What are the TV shows that you watch? What are the things you enjoy about them? What movies are you grateful for? How did they affect you?

Think of sports, theater, paintings, or other works of art that bring you joy and you’re thankful for.

21. Books and knowledge

What books have influenced you? What stories resonated with you?

What are the things you learned that changed your life? How did you learn them?

22. Music and sound

Listen to your favorite artist and feel the creative energy behind their work. What do you feel? Reflect on how their music elevates you.

What sounds around are you thankful for—birds chirping, a child laughing, someone drumming, wood crackling in a fireplace, typing on your keyboard?

23. Animals and pets

Give thanks today for all the pets you have or had in the past. We can learn so much from animals and how they live their life, moment by moment, doing their thing without judgment or complaints.

What lessons did you learn from your pets? Do you have any fond memories of times you spent playing with a pet?

24. Nature

Today notice every thing around you that’s part of life, the soil, trees, shrubs, grass, the clouds, the color of the sky, the weather.

Reflect on all the things we extract from earth—oil, metals & minerals and plants.

25. Services

Pay close attention to all the services that you use on a daily basis. When you start your shower, think of all the plumbing and work that is done to get you hot water and to drain the water that you use. Think of what it takes to dispose of all the waste we produce.

And don’t forget to appreciate the building structures, the roads, and the power and cable lines. How much planning and hard work it took to create the entire infrastructure that we use every day.

26. Science and technology

Our knowledge of the planet, ourselves and life around us has grown exponentially. Consider the advent of printing, radio, television, the telephone, satellite and the internet.

We are connected today because of all the advances in technology.  Look at the computer screen, mobile phone or tablet that you’re reading this article on and think of all the resources required to provide you with the equipment, power and communication services.

27. Medicine and healing

We are so fortunate to live in times where we have options. We can go to the doctor and get treatment or choose a naturopathic approach. The quality of life has improved tremendously because of the giant leap in vaccines and  medicine. We have been able to eradicate diseases that killed millions in the past.

Reflect today on how you benefit from such advances compared to our ancestors.

28. The universe

We live on a planet that is situated at the perfect distance from the sun—our star and main source of energy. The moon serves its purpose in climate and tide control seamlessly. How lucky are we to be supported by 4.5 billion years of expansion and evolution. Our existence is the miracle of all miracles. So let’s celebrate it today.

Look at the heavens. Give thanks to the moon, the sun, the stars and all the invisible energy and forces that run in the background making life as we know it possible.

29. Beauty

As we get closer to the end of our journey, let’s start looking into the truth behind every creation and expression around us. When we truly look, we see beauty at its utmost profound level.

When you look deep, you will see everything as a work of art. Your kitchen tiles, the design or print on your bed sheets, the shape of a light bulb, your computer or cell phone, the fabric on a chair, the thread on a tire. Expand your awareness today and see the exquisite in everything.

30. Love and connection

Love is what life is made from; it’s at the core of our being. Give thanks for all the people and all the things you love in your life. Appreciate the people who love you the way you are and are there to support you.

Celebrate love today from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep. You will find plenty of it all around you.

What’s next

Focusing on what’s good when things are going smoothly is easy. It’s much harder to be grateful in the midst of rocky and challenging times. No matter how bad things seem, there is always something to be grateful for. The mind shift happens when you keep looking for the goodness in everyday life experiences.

After 30 days of focused gratitude I recommend you keep a journal (paper, or computer, doesn’t matter). In your journal write about two things:

I. Your success for the day

Write about what you got done today. Did you make it to work or a meeting on time? Did you brush your teeth? Did you empty the dishwasher?

There is no small success.  You don’t have to be detailed; just create a simple list. Try to list at least 5 to 10 things per day. For example:

1. Woke up at 6
2. Meditated
3. Showered
4. Took the dog for a walk
5. Had lunch with a friend
6. Wrote in journal
7. Published blog post
8. Paid bills
9. Completed ABC report
10. Worked out for 10 minutes

II. Things you’re grateful for

Write five things each day that you’re grateful for. This can include health, money, family, friends, a fresh cup of coffee, the washing machine. Come up with five things. The next day find five different things to be thankful for.

The gratitude habit

As you go about your day, notice anything that can make it to your list of success and gratitude. Write it down as soon as you can. Sometimes by the end of the day you just need to reflect on your list.

The whole process of journaling about success and what you’re grateful for is simple and won’t take you more than 10 minutes. However, it will transform your life. You will shift from focusing on what went wrong in your day to what went right. Do this for a whole year and see what happens.

Together we can create a gratitude movement. If we spend just a few minutes every day reflecting on what’s working in our lives we will change our world—one thought and emotion at a time.

Let’s use Meister Eckhart’s infamous saying as a mantra to enforce the habit of gratitude.

If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, “thank you,” that would suffice.

This is the perfect time of the year to express our gratitude for all the gifts we’ve been fortunate enough to receive in this life.

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.” ~William Arthur Ward

We all have experienced happiness and sadness, pain and pleasure, well being and illness, gain and loss and all sorts of ups and downs. Let’s stop and reflect on our experiences with gratefulness and appreciation.

The power of gratitude

Gratitude is the best networking approach that keeps you in close contact with abundance.

Every time you express deep and profound gratitude, you align yourself with life. You become closer to the limitless creative energy of the universe.

And just like the doors of opportunity open up for you because of the people you know, the doors of universal goodness open up. The more thanks you give to the universe, the more things you will receive to be thankful for.

When you constantly think of the best, you become the best—the most powerful and effortless transformation.

The grace of gratitude

Being thankful has amazing positive effects. Studies have shown that people who kept a gratitude journal writing daily 5 to 10 things they’re grateful for increased their happiness and well being, and boosted their progress towards their goals.

Being in a state of gratefulness will open your heart and raise your vibrational resonance. It will uplift your spirit in the darkest of times.

The gratitude connection

“At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.” ~Albert Schweitzer

When you express gratitude, you give yourself the gift of lightness and appreciation.  You start gravitating more towards the beauty and wisdom of all of life. Every experience and feeling becomes a gift.

As you focus more on gratitude, you see the value and contribution of the amazing people around you. You radiate gratefulness in your exchange with others passing on the gift of gratitude.

You uplift others in the process and elevate the positive energy of everyone—the most precious gift you can give to the universe. And the universe returns the favor by handing you more love and beauty. It’s a universal and collective win.

The  journey

Knowing the positive impact gratitude has, it becomes necessary to make it a habit—to continuously give thanks for all the good that comes to you.

Today I invite you to join me and other fellow passengers on this wondrous journey and go for a 30 days gratitude adventure.

Every day we will pick one thing that we’re grateful for. We’ll explore it in depth and reflect positively—with appreciation—on the experience, object, interaction, or creation.

You don’t have to do these in sequence or even pick the same items. The most important thing is to pick one thing every day and focus your intention and energy on being grateful with all of your heart and soul.

If you have the time to write down your thoughts at the end of the day and how you feel, it will engage your entire brain and enhance your experience.

We all have demonstrated that we have the power and ability to accomplish what we desire, thrive and overcome and move past challenges. Let’s celebrate life and its blessings together.

1. Breath

If I were to connect life with one word it would be breath. We breathe life on average 20,000 times per day.

Today focus on your breathing as much as you can. Stop every hour or so and take a few deep breaths. Follow the oxygen as it goes into your body and notice how your magnificent body eliminates toxins.

Think of the oxygen in our atmosphere and how we get the necessary dose to breathe and energize the body. Look at the forms of life around you and notice how they’re breathing.

How does it feel to be able to breathe?  What’s the value of every breath you take? How grateful are you?

2. Movement

Today become more aware of the way you move. Start when you get up in the morning, move around your home, get ready, walk, grab something, kick something, or write something. Pay attention to your feet, legs, arms, hands and fingers.

Reflect on all the things you can do because you’re able to move.

3. Body functions and organs

Pay attention to how your body sends you signals all day. Become aware of how your body lets you know that you’re thirsty, hungry or you need a bathroom break.

Think of all the work that goes in the background to get nutrients from what you eat, hydrate your body and eliminate excess waste.

How fortunate are we to have such amazing and complex organs functioning seamlessly!

4. Senses

Indulge your senses today by giving your full awareness to the experience. Taste the goodness in food; really feel what you touch; look with focus and see the beauty around you; listen with intent and smell the freshness of the season.

If you wish to take it deeper, reflect on each sense for a day instead of grouping them all together.

5. Food & drink

Whatever you eat and drink today, consume it with appreciation. Think of the time, effort and resources that were expended for you to have what you’re having.

Give thanks to other forms of life that generously give to you—vegetables, fruits, herbs, cows, pigs, chicken, turkey, fish and so on.

6. Brain power

Observe your thoughts today. Whenever you do anything, become aware of the command that you give and how your body responds instantly.

Be thankful for the super computer that runs your body, your thoughts and your imagination.

7. Receiving

We often focus on what we’re lacking and what we want to have. Let’s take a break and focus on what we have received in our life.

Think of all the money you received, be it a salary, a gift, an inheritance or assistance.  Bring to memory all the other gifts, big and small, that you received.

You will be amazed by how much value you have received over a lifetime.

8. Giving

Let’s shift the focus to what you gave in a lifetime. Think of all the money, gifts, and help you have given over the years. Include all the money you paid for services and products, donations, and anything else you can think of.

How many people benefited because of your giving? Countless I bet.

9. Success

Taking a day to be grateful for success is something that will invigorate you and restore your confidence.

What are all the achievements in your life? Include everything that you can think of like education, family, work, health, business.

How do you feel about your success?

10. Failure

Instead of the usual self abuse over failure, let’s think today of the positive side of not playing it safe.

What are the things you feel you failed at? Did you take any risk? What lessons have you learned and how did you grow from such experiences?

11. Home

What are all the things you like about your home? Reflect on the security and  warmth of being at home. It’s your shelter, your sanctuary and the place you always come back to.

Give thanks for the building and construction process and all the machines and people that transformed materials into the place you call home.

12. Clothing

Take a look in your closet and think of all the work that was done to create the clothing items that you wear—from design, fabric, machines and labor to the store where you bought them.

Feel the embrace of fabric against your body, the protection and comfort your clothes give you.

13. Furniture

As you get up in the morning, look at the bed you’re sleeping in and how much  rest it gives you. Think of the ways you are supported by every chair or couch you sit on, every table or desk you use.

Think of the process of creating these items and how they got to you—the long journey it took to transform raw material into things of beauty and comfort.

14. Belongings

From the time you get up to the time you go to sleep, look at everything in your surroundings, appliances, electronics, cars, musical instruments, pens, paper, funds you have, investments, and so on.

Just like we did before, think of all the creative ideas behind such items and the entire process of making them come to life and be of use to you.

15. Skills and gifts

There are so many skills that we have acquired over the years that we take for granted. Today think of such skills like being able to walk, push a wheelchair, read, write, use a computer, surf the internet, drive, ride a bicycle, draw, take photographs, play a musical instrument, and anything else you can think of.

You also have so many gifts that you may not even notice. Think of the things that come naturally to you, like a sense of humor, intuition, imagination and creativity, wit, ability to learn, ability to connect with other people with ease. Give thanks for all your skills and abilities.

Because this article is long, I have split it into two parts. The second part will be released within a week.

I’m so grateful for you dear reader and for every communication I have with you. Happy thanksgiving to our American friends.

Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower.  ~Albert Camus

In the past few days I’ve witnessed the magnificence of nature—autumn is in full swing. Life said goodbye to the warmth of the summer and is readying itself for the cold winter.

Leaves are dancing to the gust of wind in a symphony of color, flying freely, giving in to their fate … gracefully.

There are a few lessons that this season and nature can teach us about life. These are the most important ones that I want to share with you today.

Lesson 1: non-attachment

The Buddhists believe that the origin of suffering is attachment to transient things.

Leaves grow attached to their mother tree. However, when it is time to move on, they fall to the ground freely. They don’t hold on more than they need to. The tree lets go of the leaves it mothered with grace and complete surrender. It doesn’t hold on to them when they are no longer needed.

One can look at it as an act of love as well. The leaves were not meant to withstand the harshness of the winter. They served their purpose and they can be of better service to life as they transform to mulch and feed the earth. I can view myself as the tree and every person and experience in my life as a leaf. Each leaf is there to serve a purpose. When things end, I can move on just like the tree and let the experiences and people go—without holding on to the past with its regrets and triumphs.

We can let go of stories, experiences and people that have moved on or as we grow and move on ourselves.

Lesson 2: contentment

He is richest who is content with the least, for content is the wealth of nature. ~ Socrates

All leaves are dealt their hand in life. Some leaves get to grow at the top of the tree, others in the middle and some closer to the bottom. Some leaves are bright and shiny and others might have some browning spots or are misshapen. Each one of those leaves contributes to the overall existence of the tree. No leaf is better or worse. Leaves don’t compare themselves to each other or want more of what they don’t have. Each leaf evolves as it is to serve its purpose as part of the tree.

We can look at humanity as the tree and each one of us as a leaf. Some are privileged; others are not.  Human leaves come in all shapes and forms and abilities. None of us is better or worse, we all are here to be part of the tree of humanity—contributing to its beauty and evolution. We don’t need to have any more than what we have to serve our purpose and be all we can be.

Lesson 3: surrender

Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does. ~George Bernard Shaw

When I look at the wind blowing and pushing the leaves around, I feel it’s bullying them and kicking them into submission. But I don’t think this is how the leaves experience it. Instead of fighting and resisting the wind, they move with it without complaining.

We can do the same as the wind starts to blow in our lives. We can move with life without fighting and resisting. We can accept what life hands us and make the best of it, trusting that it is serving the greater purpose of our growth.

The beauty of life lies in its constant graceful and surrendered change.  Let’s join life in its celebration of the season by fully accepting and living our own life as it unfolds in this moment.

No spring, nor summer beauty hath such grace,

As I have seen in one autumnal face. ~John Donne

What does a new born believe in? What does a four year old believe in? What do you believe in?

Are our beliefs mostly helpful or harmful to ourselves and others? Do they reflect the truth of our existence?

Can we live without beliefs?

To answer these questions, let’s look at what beliefs are vs. truths.

Truths are undeniable and universal. The earth is round. The sun is our star and the planets orbit the sun. Gravity works on earth.

Truths have been proven to be true. We don’t need to validate them beyond that.

Beliefs on the other hand are selective, personal and changeable.

Everything we tell ourselves about ourselves, others and the world comes from beliefs.

If you see the world as a violent and unjust place, it’s because you believe it to be so. If you believe you are not good enough, or people are not trust worthy, you will find that as well.

The opposite is true of course. You can believe that the world is a compassionate and loving place. You may believe that you can do anything you set your mind to and that people are overwhelmingly supportive and kind.

As you can see above, such selectiveness can be dangerous. Why? Simply put because we have a negative bias, because of the way we’re conditioned to grow up.

The dangers of certain beliefs

Beliefs masquerade as truths.

Once a belief sets in, it becomes a personal truth; we view the world and our experiences from that perspective only. In other words, we create our vision of reality.

In any society acceptable customs and traditions all turn into beliefs over time. The collective follows what was set out by a group of people in the past. Each society has its own standards of beauty, success, status happiness, and acceptable ways to behave and interact with others. These beliefs become societal truths.

Beliefs require constant validation.

When we believe something, we look for proof that it’s true. The mind is always looking for ways to prove that we are right. And guess what? We will be right, all the time.

If you believe you’re not good enough, you constantly keep looking for ways to prove that you are not enough.

When we feel our way (what we believe in) is threatened, we attack others and their beliefs. We become one with our beliefs; they are part of who we are. So anything that challenges our way of thinking represents an attack on us.

Beliefs create a fixed view of what is and what should be.

Look behind most controlling actions and you will find an underlying belief that something should be this way. Or a person should behave that way. Or I must be doing this instead of that.

Each belief represents a single view that won’t accommodate any other possible position—especially an opposing one. It’s my way or the highway.

Can we live without beliefs?

Can we stop believing? I honestly don’t know.

What I know for sure is that we can become more aware of our beliefs and we can choose what we believe in.

Once we increase our awareness, we can stop following beliefs blindly and do things differently.

Our beliefs are not sacred and can be wrong. We can challenge and question them.

Awakening to the truth: how to let go of beliefs

If we go back to how beliefs were formed, we realize that we didn’t exert any effort. We allowed the expectations of society and the meaning we assigned to certain experiences to repeat over time and seep into our subconscious mind, unquestioned.

To awaken, we can go through these simple but powerful processes.

Stop believing everything.

Whenever you have an opinion, stop before you turn it into a full blown belief about a situation, and think for a moment.

Let’s look at this example:

Someone bumps into me at the supermarket. She looks at me indignantly as if it’s my fault. I immediately think to myself she is rude. Automatically, I extrapolate this view that the world is full of rude and delusional people. What’s wrong with humanity?

Then I start looking for rudeness everywhere—in the parking lot, at the work place, at home. And I find plenty of rude people.

I can choose to stop for a second after the incident before making a judgment that the person is rude.

This short moment may be all I need to diffuse the situation in my mind. If it’s not enough I’ll consider the next step.

Question and challenge beliefs.

Beliefs take a hold because they go unquestioned. At a deeper level we know that our beliefs are not truths; that’s why we keep looking for ways to prove that they’re right.

What if we start looking for ways to prove that they are wrong?

In the example above, I can ask myself how do I know that she’s rude? Well she bumped into me and then got pissed that I was in her way. She didn’t apologize.

Are there any other reasons that this person behaved the way they did?

Maybe she was having a bad day. Maybe she was on medication and not feeling well. Maybe she was in her head and when she bumped into me she was startled. Maybe things happened so fast that she didn’t realize that she needed to apologize. Maybe she’s having problems at work or at home or caring for someone who is sick and wasn’t paying attention.

How many maybes can you come up with? Which one of them is the truth?

I don’t know. Do you? So how can we pick one possibility and make it the ultimate outcome of an experience, then turn it into a truth?

Once you cast doubt on a belief, you disempower it and stop it from running rampant in your mind and heart as a holy truth.

If someone didn’t question that the earth was flat, we would still believe that it was. If someone didn’t challenge racial segregation, we wouldn’t have changed our ways. This is the power of questioning beliefs.

Embrace not knowing.

The human ego is a ruthless dictator. It wants to be right all the time. And in order for it to be right, it needs to know something. Not knowing is considered a sign of ignorance and weakness.

In the example above, I don’t know for sure if the person I bumped into at the supermarket is rude. So why believe my thoughts about the situation?

Another simple example is when you ask someone for directions and they give you the wrong ones because they don’t want to say they don’t know. You can ask a few people and get different directions and then you’re more lost.

Personally, I’d rather someone tell me they don’t know than misguide me. I think it’s fair to assume that most people want the truth vs. made up directions.

We don’t have to believe other people’s statements and opinions blindly—they don’t know, just like us.

Beliefs give us a sense of comfort that comes from the illusionary certainty of knowing. The truth about beliefs is that we don’t know much about anything. We know very little about the world and our existence.

We have suffered long enough because of unfounded beliefs. We can choose to believe as much we can choose not to believe. And that is freedom.

The truth is you are alive now; you have a choice and you don’t know everything.

Open up to life as is. Welcome your experiences with the curiosity and enthusiasm of a child without the bias and trepidation of beliefs. Choose to support yourself and others and let the rest go. When you do this, you’ll heal your mind and heart … you will become peace on earth.

Do you want to feel more peace in your life right at this moment?

If the answer is yes, then do this one thing: Regardless of what it is you’re doing or experiencing, do the best you can. That’s it.

Doing the best you can is very simple. When you’re contemplating or starting something, intend on doing the best you can.

Say to yourself (inwardly or outwardly) I’ll do the best I can.

The beauty of your best

Doing your best will transform the way you do the simplest of tasks. Think of these benefits.

Awakening to this moment

When you do your best, you’ll experience life on a whole new level. You’ll be fully immersed in what you’re doing. You will have sharp, but soft focus on one action without the need to think about what was before or what’s coming after.

Acceptance and appreciation

The underlying intention of doing your best, will pave the way for you to experience this moment as is. If you’re feeling angry, it’s the best you can feel. If you’re feeling happy, it’s your best as well. Accepting what you’re feeling will ease you into action with more awareness.

If you know you’re doing your best, you can’t expect anything more from yourself. You will accept your effort for what it is.

And when you accept, you open your entire being to life. You set yourself up in a feel good loop. You accept and appreciate, and you feel better, and as you feel better, you appreciate more.

Being at peace

When you experience what’s unfolding right now, without struggle, you will feel an inner calm. You will go with it and let everything else float in the background.

How do you do your best?

How can you tell if you’re doing your best? It’s very simple. Look within and see how you’re feeling at the moment. Are you contented? Are you calm? Or are you anxious and frazzled? Only you can tell.

Consider these simple guidelines that I found useful in my own experience of trying to do my best.

No standards

You get to define what best means to you. There are no grades or gold stars. This is your best—you own it.

No perfection

Your best is personal, not perfect. It’s dynamic and flexible. It will change and grow with you over time.

No expectations

Put in your best effort without any regard to outcomes. Don’t focus on goals and targets; do the best you can and the results will take care of themselves.

No rush

You can’t do your best if you’re obsessing over how fast you’re going and trying to save time. Go for it and forget time all together.

More play

Don’t take things too seriously. The best is usually light hearted and playful.

A way of life

Doing your best can become a way of life for you—every minute and every day—whether it’s a mental challenge, a physical experience or an emotional meltdown. Reminding yourself that you’re doing the best you can is the best way to handle anything.

When you wake up in the morning, remind yourself that your intention today is to do the best you can. Do your best when you move out of bed; make your shower the best one you’ve ever had. Get dressed like it’s fashion week for you. Eat the best breakfast you can have. Do the best job you can do. Smile your best smile. Laugh your best laugh and cry your best cry.

It is the smallest of moments, experienced to the fullest, that infuse your life with the most profound meaning and value. A life lived moment by moment the best way possible is a life well lived.

“Act well at the moment, and you have performed a good action for all eternity.” ~Johann Kaspar Lavater

To your best!